There was a tap on my window at half past two -
I thought my luck had changed!
So I opened my curtain to see who it was
And there was Dave looking quite deranged.
For a while he wondered if the curry he’d cooked
Had taken a turn for the worse
But then a nagging memory came back to him
It was kidney stones! Of course!
He told me he’d called an ambulance -
He was really in terrible pain -
But by the time they arrived the pain had subsided
So to go with them there was nothing to gain.
About half past five, more dead than alive,
We crawled back to our beds for a sleep
But about ten o’clock Dave woke with a shock
The pain would make a grown man weep.
“I need to go to hospital” 
Dave grimaced in pain as he spoke
So I packed up my van at Mystic Sands
And off to Townsville I went with this bloke.
“I’d rather not have morphine” he said
So the nurse gave him Endone and stuff
But it wasn’t long before he begged for relief
That other ‘stuff’ was not enough!
As the morphine hit Dave’s system
He drifted off to sleep with a smile
So I sat and read the newspaper-
He was out to it for a while.
When he finally came to he was free of the pain
The happiest all day I’d seen
The first words he said as he came out of his trance were
“I really love morphine!”
Now we know Dave is not a junkie
He enjoys just a beer and a wine
So we’ll keep him away from the hard drugs
In case he gets used to feeling that fine!

Rosemary Robinson September 2021

2 thoughts on “Stoned!

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